TJ Ford: Stayin On Point.

Raptors nation has been lately been up in arms, over the the point guard tandem of TJ Ford and Jose Calderon. Since Raptors fans need something to bitch and complain about the debate has been raised on who should start and who shouldn't start. Unfortunately, due to the injuries to TJ Ford, Jose has now become the starting PG for the Toronto Raptors.

Before TJ was injured in that game against Dallas earlier this year. He was arguably the MVP of the Raps so far. Only dude who was bringing it night in, night out, while Bosh and Bargs were battling injuries and 1-11 shooting nights. He was playing a more controlled pace compared to last year and was shooting almost 50%. TJ brings alot more than just scoring and distribution of the basketball, he brings an edge, an intensity. His Swag is Phenomenal... when his jumper is falling, TJ Ford plays like the top tier point gaurds, even though he is still only 23 and ranked #6 behind the usual suspects(Nash, Parker, etc.) for Efficiency.

TJ haters like to point out that he plays a bit reckless, takes ill-advised shots and is not a pass first PG. Also that when TJ scores big we lose. These people would prefer Jose Calderon as the starter of our team. While I like Jose, he could definitely be a starter on the bottom half of the teams in the league, he's nowhere on TJ's level.

While TJ's decision making is improving by leaps and bounds, he shouldn't be described as reckless. TJ plays a little more reckless or "dynamic" when compared to Jose. TJ's the only player who can consistently get to wherever they want to get on the court using a combination of his quickness and dribble. He causes havoc for teams who run set defenses especially when breaking them down off the bounce and kicking to our open shooters. While Jose runs a mean pick and roll, he can't get those open lay-ups that he was getting last year. Teams read the scouting report and don't let him turn the corner which means he has to shoot or swing it around. This leads to our offense becoming stagnant if jumpers aren't falling.

TJ's ability to find the open man is underrated. People like to point out Assist-to-Turnover ratio as a basis of the TJ-Jose debate. I say thats a useless stat because the top tier point guards in the league have a high # of turnovers, Steve Nash averages 3.2 per game. D-Mart is currently leading the league with a 12-1 ratio and we all know how great of a PG D-Mart is. Jose has a respectable 5.83 Asst/TO ratio. Jose's stats have been inflated due to the fact he plays against other team's benches but more importantly because he plays a safer game. When I say safer game I mean, he will not try to go to the lane for a foul mostly because the officials don't respect him but because he chooses to make the safe pass... to Bosh on a pick and roll. Our fast break points have been fully minimized when Jose's out there due to his lack of playing the passing lanes on defense but also due to the fact that if we do have a fast break he just pulls it back an waits for the rest of the team so we can set up the pick and roll. This is all great and dandy but we run a PREDICTABLE Offense. The scouting report on us would be don't go under the pick and close out on all shooters. We would be left shooting contested jumpshots all night, rather than having a free flowing offense looking for the open man. When it comes to the playoffs and you're playing the same team atleast 4 times in a row, you think they'd figure out your plan on offense when all you run is pick and roll and no one can beat you off the bounce? TJ's dynamic play keeps defenses on their heels, constantly having them to adjust rotate or be wary where the open shooters are because TJ will find them. The Raptors do not have any other player who can create their own shot. Without TJ attacking the defense the Raptors are a jumpshooting team, and a team that lives by the shot, dies by the shot as well.

People like to mention that TJ takes ill-advised shots. I like to think, good for him that he has the confidence to take that shot whenever the defence gives it to him. TJ's intensity and confidence on the court instantly make our team better. He's afraid of no one, has the intensity and edge to get through a playoff series. On a soft team like the Raptors, he is the only player on our team who's consistently brings it. As much as I like Bosh, he admitted he was shook in last year's playoff series but what player was bringing it night in an night out no matter what, thats right TJ Ford. As shown last year when he won that game against the clippers at the buzzer or with that game winning assist to Bargnani for the win in Portland the following night. Even after the injuries, TJ still has the confidence that he can make the shot when the game comes down to the wire. That my friends is called Balls, he's the most clutch player on the team, hands down.

People like to say that "we need a pass first point guard, we have enough scorers". While I agree to that in theory. In theory, communism works. The top PGs in the League can and will drop 20 points a night if needed, if other players are not getting the job done. TJ does a good job at recognizing when our players aren't playing well and takes teh shots himself to keep us in the ball game. Our players are all shooters and if the jumpshot isnt falling, it usually does a number on their confidence. To average 8-10 assists is excellent for a young point guard, averaging over 10+ assists doesn't equal victories (unless you're Steve Nash, but even he's surrounded by slashers and cutters) . As a PG you have to be able to score to keep the defenses honest, and keep them on their heels. The reason TJ scores so much when we lose is because everyone else just starts tossing up bricks, TJ decides to add a bit more scoring himself. When TJ is scoring between 15-20 and dishing 8-10, we are that 47 win team which won the Atlantic Division title.

Get well soon TJ!

Wes Anderson Hearts Brown People

Lately I’ve been getting some flack from people asking me why I haven’t got a chance to update my blog or whatever whatever. I been busy, what can I say?

One of my favorite movies of all time is Life Aquatic with Steve Zizzou directed by Wes Anderson. This is an off colour comedy staring Bill Murray along with a stellar supporting cast including Jeff Goldblum and Owen Wilson. Bill Murray makes this movie hilarious with his awkward brand of humour. Recently I was told that if I enjoyed Life Aquatic that I would enjoy the previous Wes Anderson movies, Rushmore and The Royal Tanenbaums.

This interest has really been peaked lately due to the release of Wes Anderson’s new film The Darjeeling Limited, staring Owen Wilson and Jason Schwartzman who have been characters in his previous movies. I recently watched Rushmore and Royal Tenenbaums. Both movies were very well written and had a spectacular cast and provided humour in many awkward moments with clever dialogue.

One reason why I like these movies besides the satirical humour is Wes Anderson’s use of Indian people as hilarious supporting cast members which interact with the main actors as normal people rather than stereotypical use of Indian characters i.e. Convenience store clerks or Math nerds. In Life Aquatic, a prominent role is given to the camera man, Vikram Ray, who interacts with Bill Murray and William Defoe as hilarity ensues. Vikram is a turban wearing Sikh who even at times is shown without wearing his turban and jus lazing around the ship in a more natural form. When I first saw this, I couldn’t believe that they had depicted a turban wearing Sikh like this. This is surely a step forward in educating the American people on Sikhs and

people of Indian origin as a whole, especially in America where ignorance reigns supreme. In Rushmore there was an Indian actor but he was a janitor or cleaner of some sort and had little to no lines but provided a slight multicultural element in the movie. This element was further developed when this same actor Kumar Pallana, was shown as Gene Hackman’s right hand man and family servant Pagoda in The Royal Tanenbaums. Pagoda has an interesting back story and a couple of hilarious bits through out the movie especially one particular stabbing scene.

The new movie by Wes Anderson is set on a train which goes through India and revolves around 3 brothers. There was a recent article posted on Slate about Wes Anderson’s portrayal of coloured people. From my perspective this article is just one man’s point of view and necessarily don’t think Wes Anderson to be a racist.

Sometimes Wes Anderson winks at the brothers' fetishistic attitudes toward India, but he eventually reveals his own. When Francis grandly declares, "I love these people"—minutes after a shoeshine boy has run off with one of his "$3,000 loafers"—or when Peter says, "I love how this country smells; it's … spicy," Anderson must be chuckling at them.--Slate

The article can be read here

Here’s an article from the New York Press with Waris Alhuwalia, the actor who plays Satyajit Ray in Darjeeling Limited and Vikram Ray in Life Aquatic. He addresses the Slate article and how he and Wes Anderson have been friends and what’s it like to be in a Wes Anderson movie.

Speaking about the scene from Darjeeling..

We knew that was racist. It's the character. It's done to agitate Owen's character. When you go into a foreign country, you run that risk. Wes treated the country beautifully, in terms of how he shot it. It's earnest and honest. The films of Satyajit Ray are something that he loves. He got really into it.- Waris Alhuwalia

The interview can be read here.

From what I’ve heard about Darjeeling Limited, that it actually shows India off whether it be the beauty of the landscape or the people and like typical Wes Anderson flicks, hilarity ensues. I commend Wes Anderson for deciding to make a movie here and again showing the audience something they haven’t seen yet. I can’t wait to see it.

Domo Arigato Dr Roboto?

Recently I went to the doctor's office, and knowing my previous experience with doctors resulted in 4 different doctors and 4 different diagnosis, I wasn't looking forward to it. So I figured I would do the research before and self diagnose myself an see if the doctor agreed with me. Lo an behold, he did, said I was pretty much right on, wrote my prescription and I was then on my way. As I was leaving, and reminiscing of some of the inabilities of doctors. Sticking to the theme of this blog, being slightly outrageous to stupidly insane. I determined that, doctors can and will be replaced by robots.

Yes, Robots. From my bare basic knowledge, everyday doctors, your common GP (General Practitioner) can be replaced by a robot which is database driven for information purposes. Where you don't have to answer questions like, "Are you allergic to this or that?" or "Have you been sick in the past". A robot could pull up the data of a patients medical history and then determine what prescription would be the most suitable.

The human body has not changed for at least the last 100 years. This can easily be programmed into a robot using complex algorithms. Knee bone connected to the...hip bone....etc. Robots with built in computers could determine what ails you and what prescription can suit you through scanning and knowing your medical history.

Currently, there is a varying degree of expertise in the profession. The differences between a 50 year old physician and a new graduate are quite extensive. With robots, this discrepancy wouldn't exist since each Robot would be as competent as the next. You won't have to worry if your dumb ass doctor (oxymoron?) giving you an incorrect diagnosis or a prescription that doesn't suit you.

As a generalization, I feel a lot of these diagnosis's are procedure based, as in the eliminate the options based on what you ate last, what you're allergic to, what your previous medical history is, etc. Once they determined that, they match your symptoms to some condition that's written in a book. If all these descriptions were available online (which there are) could be cross referenced with what the patient is experiencing and their previous history and also other patients with similar symptoms, I think this would definitly eliminate the massive wait times, the general inefficiency of the medical practice.

I recently read this article microchips which are the size of rice kernels, to be planted within patients. These microchips could provide the a patients medical history.

The American Medical Association has endorsed the use of implantable microchips to help reduce medical errors and adverse drug reactions. “Passive tags,” implanted under the skin with a needle, contain identification numbers that can be scanned by a radio frequency reader and then used to retrieve a patient’s medical records. Tags approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration contain such data as the presence of a pacemaker or chronic disease.
It said the chips may help to identify patients, "thereby improving the safety and efficiency of patient care," reports the latest issue of the Canadian Medical Association Journal.

The article was found in the Toronto Star can be read here.


Another article I came across while formulating my ideas is from MSNBC regarding another pilot program involving RoboDoc's. The 200-pound (90-kilogram) robots stand about 5 feet (1.5 meters) tall. They have flat video screens for heads, and video cameras serve as their eyes and ears. The aim of the technology isn't to replace human doctors, but to make it more convenient for doctors to check in with their patients, and for patients to get quick access to personal physicians who aren't at the hospital. It is just a matter of time before this type of technology can completely take over that position. More can be read here about it.

Also, imagine the hit television series that would be produced by this new RoboDoc hype. First there would be EER (Electro Emergency Room). Where a crack team of ER robots take care of patients in the ER with zany results. Housing Mechanism MDDR-Ram 1.0, This one is about an angry robot doctor who has been programed to follow the rules...his own. Last but not least my favorite show, The Grey Robot's Anatomy. This show revolves around a scandalous Grey RoboDoc who just can't keep her hardware closed. Her emoticon chip has been programmed without logic algorithms. Watch as she tries her luck with RoboSurgeon and Animal RoboDoc. These are just an example of the types of shows we might be in for.

DISCLAIMER: This is by no way a disrespect to the the doctors and nurses and everyone in the medical profession who are saving lives, every day at the hospital emergency room or doctor's office. Their profession is quite stressful and engaging and could not be done by your average Joe Schmo.

Open Sesame

Recently in my post work haze which usually involves a slight case of brain comatose and a larger case of being oblivious to my environment. Once I pull into my driveway, my itinerary consists of taking of my sunglasses (if its sunny), after that I get out of my car, take my briefcase out of my trunk, hit the lock button and get to the once I've locked my car using the key fob, I sauntered in my post work stupor upto my front door.....and recently been trying to unlock the front door with my car key fob, pressing unlock, and then trying to open the door then realizing that I have to use the Neanderthal method of unlocking the door. This led me to wonder why this hasn't been implemented in society.

Whats the difference with having keyless entry to the front door and your car? If you lose your keys, they can unlock your car and get into your house with the key if needed. I was more surprised that my brain has been now wired to try an open my front door with my car keys due to habits formed from deep in the subconscious. Either way, I thought it was pretty interesting and I want my keyless house entry damn it!

What do you guys think?

The Simpsons - It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times?! Stupid Monkey!

I've been a big fan of the Simpsons for as long as I can remember, whether it be using random quotes as responses to life's everyday questions, its a television show that is one of my all time favs. With the release of the new Simpsons Movie, which has been 18 years in the making, a side of me was excited on the idea of a movie of my favourite show and to relive all the comedic joy from my years past. The other side of me determined that if the movie was anything like the current show, that it'll be a huge disappointment. The best Simpsons episodes were from the early seasons preferable 4-10 after the show became a bit contrived and the jokes weren't really there. My fav character is probably Mr Burns, Kent Brockman, Milhouse, and Homer of course. I've compiled a list of my favorite quotes.

Enjoy!

Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
Homer: Bart, go to your room.

Homer: Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked!
Marge: HOMER!
Homer: I gotta go Moe my damn weiner kids are listening.

Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)

Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

Marge: Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't show up tomorrow don't bother showing up on Monday.
Homer: Woo-hoo. Four-day weekend.

Homer: I bet Einstein turned himself all sorts of colors before he invented the light bulb.

Grampa: [writing] I am disgusted with the way old people are depicted on television. We are not all vibrant, fun-loving sex maniacs. Many of us are bitter, resentful individuals, who remember the good old days, when entertainment was bland and inoffensive.

Homer: Is that a good siren?
Bob, RV Salesman: You ever known a siren to be good? No, Mr. Simpson, it's not. It's a bad siren. That's the computer in case I went blind telling me, "Sell the vehicle to this fella and you're out of business!" That's what the siren says. It seems the Ultimate Behemoth is a wee bit out of your price range, and "wee bit" is me being polite. You couldn't afford this thing if you lived to be a million.

[Homer learns that Dimoxinil costs one thousand dollars.]
Homer: A thousand bucks!? I can't afford that!
Sales clerk: Hmm... well, we do have a product which is more in your price range. However...[He pulls out giant jug labeled "Hair in a Drum" with a $19.95 price sticker]Sales clerk:I must assure you, that any hair growth you experience while using it will be purely coincidental.

Mr. Burns: Ironic, isn't it Smithers. This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes has cost me the election, and yet if I were to have them killed, I would be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you!
Smithers: You are noble and poetic in defeat, sir.

Homer: He's awake
Marge: Oh, Bart! We thought for a minute you'd gone away from us.
Bart: I did go away, Mom! I was miles and miles and miles away, writhing in agony in the pits of Hell! And you were there! And you and you and you. You, I've never seen before.
Homer: Hey, yeah, who are you? I saw you chasing Bart's ambulance
Lionel Hutz: Hutz is the name, Mr. Simpson. Lionel Hutz, attorney-at-law. Here's my card. It turns into a sponge when you put it in water.
Homer: Ooh, classy.

Barney: Hey, Homer, you're late for English!
Homer: Pffft, English, who needs that? I'm never going to England. Come on, let's go smoke!

Homer: Which one's Selma, again?
Marge: She's the one who likes Police Academy movies and Hummel figurines, and walking through the park on clear autumn days.
Homer: Oh, yeah yeah yeah. But I thought she was the one that didn't like to be... you know... touched.
Marge: It's Patty who chose a life of celibacy. Selma simply had celibacy thrust upon her.

[Homer is eying up a pair of luxurious tennis shoes]
Homer: Oh, 125 bucks...
[Flanders appears in a `thought' balloon over Homer's head.]
Flanders: Sometimes, you got to spoil yourself... spoil yourself... spoil yourself...
Homer: But I can't afford to-
Flanders: Simpson! I order you to buy those shoes!
Homer: Okay, Flanders, you're the boss! Heh heh heh.

Mr. Burns: Excellent. Once again the wheel has turned and Dame Fortune has hugged Montgomery Burns to her sweet, perfumed bosom. Somebody up there likes me, Smithers.
Smithers: Somebody down here likes you too.
Burns: Shut Up!

Marge: Maybe a part-time job is the answer.
Bart: Oh, Mom, I couldn't ask you to do that. You're already taking care of Maggie and Lisa is such a handful.
Lisa: She means you should get a job, stupid!
Bart: [Daniel Stern's voice, à la "Wonder Years"] Me? Get a job? Were they serious? I didn't realize it at the time, but a little piece of my childhood had slipped away, forever.
Homer: Bart! What are you staring at?
Bart: Uh, nothing. [Daniel Stern continues] He didn't say it, and neither did I, but at that moment, my dad and I were closer than we-
Homer: Bart! Stop it!
Bart: Sorry.

Homer: [affecting accent] Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me.
Postal Worker: Okay, Mr. Burns, uh, what's your first name?
Homer: ...I don't know.

Burns: Who is that bookworm, Smithers?
Smithers: Homer Simpson, sir.
Burns: Simpson, eh? How very strange. His job description clearly specifies an illiterate!Chief

Wiggum: Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city. He is the cancer, and I am the... um... What cures cancer?

Homer: Boy, you don't have to follow in my footsteps.

Bart: Don't worry, I don't even like using the bathroom after you.
Kent: The time has come for finger-pointing, and most of them are squarely aimed at the boy's parents.
Homer: It's not our fault! We didn't want the boy, he was an accident!
Marge: Homer!
Homer: Uh... Could you edit that last part out?
Kent: Mr. Simpson, we're live, coast-to-coast.
Homer: D'oh!

Mr.Burns: Quick Smithers. Bring the mind eraser device!
Smithers:You mean the revolver, sir?
Mr.Burns: Precisely.

Mr. Burns: Woah, slow down there maestro. There's a *New* Mexico?

Mr. Burns: Nonsense! Dogs are idiots! Think about it, Smithers. If I came into your house and started sniffing at your crotch and slobbering all over you, what would you say?
Smithers: If you did it, sir?

Kent Brockman: We win again. But the real winners here are Marge's Hors D'Oeuvres.
Homer: How do you come up with such witty remarks?
[focuses in on ear plug/mic]
Guy in the van: I guess you could say its my racket.
Kent Brockman: I guess you could say I'm Iraqi.
Homer: Get off my property.

Kent Brockman: Scientists say they're also less attractive physically and while we speak in a well-educated manner, they tend to use low-brow expressions like 'oh yeah?' and 'com'ere a minute.'
Homer: Oh yeah? They think they're better than us, huh? Bart! Com'ere a minute.
Bart: You com'ere a minute."
Homer: Oh yeah?

Wiggum: Put out an APB on a Uosdwis R. Dewoh. Uh, better start with Greektown.
Friday: That's "Homer J. Simpson", Chief. You're reading it upside down.
Wiggum: Uh, cancel that APB. But, uh, bring back some of them, uh, gyros.
Friday: Uh, Chief? You're talking into your wallet.

I'll come up with some more later!!

The Frozen Shirt

A light bulb went off in my head after a soccer game during a hot an humid summer night. We had just finished playing and we were discussing how the Nike Dri-Fit jerseys were still soaking wet. As the synapses started firing at a faster pace, I began theorizing an idea which would provide the ultimate climate cool.

(WARNING: PATENT PENDING, aka DON'T STEAL MY SHIT, YOU RAT BASTARDS!)

My idea consists of developing a fabric similar to climacool technology or Dri-Fit, where as NO2 or Nitric Oxide is infused or woven in to provide actual cooling. These strands of "dry ice" would provide the cooling effect. Using RF technology which can detect increases in heart rate and temperature can control the precision of how cold the strands become. This material would be powered through either kinetic energy sensors built into logos which or could be powered externally from a watch or bracelet. That is the basic premise of the solution to providing the next generation of high performance clothing.

The kinetic energy or stored energy sources would provide energy to power the shirt or piece of clothing for 2 hours. Once the energy and consequently cooling capabilities of the fabric would lose its properties it would be a time for a recharge. A recharge would consist of refreezing the fabric or replacing the battery in the watch or within the logo of the shirt. The fabric would provide an even medium for temperature of the outside environment and a person's body temperature to compensate for physical activity. The cooling mesh within the shirt would allow for more comfortable approach to athlete performance.

This is a preliminary design and after some more research, we'll see if this is feasible or not. This would revolutionize clothing for an active lifestyle, an I'm sure the team at Nike or Adidas are diligently working on this...Hey guys if you need another person on your team, holla!

Operation: Banana Ram

For a team building event at work, we were taken to African Lion Safari. The entire week, I had been pitching the idea of how awesome a monkey would be around the office. You know, helpful with thing such as photocopying and occasional shit throwing contests, it would be great. This idea was formulated in my head and we figured that our upcoming trip to African Lion Safari would be the mostly opportunistic chance.

A monkey, like Homer's helper monkey Mojo, would make life just a bit more fun. The idea of being able to teach it things, make it dance, eat things, make fun of other people with it and lets not forget battle it, especially if it steals your keys or banana. Like Mojo, you can dress him up with popular monkey fashion, whether it be a glittery vest and a fez. Hell, you can pimp him out him up like 50 cent. You could even teach it to speak English, answer your phone for you.

"Hey monkey, you wanna get that? yeah tell her I'm not here....for fuck sakes, I told you answer the phone, not throw it... Get down from there!"

The monkey would be great from a career standpoint as well, and then literally have an assistant and/or scapegoat. Something goes wrong blame the monkey and then take credit for the monkey's work (this depends on how well you've taught the monkey the aspects of your job). You can't really ever teach the monkey to be the model employee because eventually that ambitions son of a bitch will be promoted or even worse take your job.

"Ok hire the monkey, Fire Bamrah"...... No one wants to hear that.

Well all week, we all had decided that it would be fun to have a monkey around the office and devised a plan which involved, luring the unsuspecting monkey to our tour bus and then some how hiding it in my shirt an leaving the park. Sadly, this fool proof plan did not pan out since they locked the tour bus doors from the outside and did not allow the windows to be opened. Our dream specifically my dream of having a monkey bring me coffee will have to wait, oh well, at least theres the co-op kids.